Drawing the circle with tarot cards
Last year was pretty rough for me, and I’m feeling the need to find new directions in a variety of areas of my life – or at least bring new energies to bear. I had an odd experience recently in that I gained back a year of my life – not really, but it feels that way. All last year I thought I was 46 – with a birthday on New Year’s Eve, it’s easy to miscalculate. Early this year I realized that I was still 46 :) It feels like a rare chance at a “do-over”, and I don’t want to blow it. Now the year is 1/3 gone already – I’ve had some great times this year, but perhaps not with the focus or direction I was hoping for.
This morning I decided to do something I’ve never really done with tarot cards – draw an elemental circle, something like a magickal circle. I’m really doing this in my mind with archetypal tarot cards, rather than with any specific deck. But as I go through the year, starting soon, I may draw upon these cards as significators for what I’m hoping to achieve, advisers if you will. I may ask them for guidance on the next step in reaching the goal personified by that card, and draw cards for an actual reading. Or I may just focus on the cards, and ask myself – what would they do, or recommend?
Here are my cards:
Earth: Knight of Pentacles – This element represents health to me, one of my biggest issues last year. My health has steadily improved, but I have a ways to go in diet and exercise and overall well-being, now that I am not prevented from these things by more serious problems. As I thought through the deck, I couldn’t imagine any card that more solidly represented a physical fit, healthy, youthful person. One of the things I like about this Knight is his methodical, planning-oriented approach to these issues. No fad diets or unsustainable goals for him – and on the flip side, determination and will-power with little inclination to slack off or be unreliable. If he needed to be in shape for something specific, you know he’d be ready when the time came. Besides, I get the impression that he’s less boring than he looks. If asked, he could come up with all kinds of creative approaches to meeting these goals.
Water: The Lovers – A long-term relationship has just ended that was perfect on a personal level and utterly impossible circumstantially. It was painful and difficult, but necessary for both of us. It’s hard to think about starting over, but I do feel that I have a clear sense of what I’m looking for. I have put The Lovers in this position not entirely because of the obvious meaning of the title – rather because of the more nuanced interpretations it has. I am looking for someone who is complimentary to me, not someone to lose myself in or vice versa. A relationship that is deeply committed, yet where each person has their own space (emotionally and physically). Where marriage is not the goal (many other cards could have been chosen for that), but a togetherness, understanding, and passion that may be stronger than exists in many marriages. This is a relationship where we constantly make choices about staying together, rather than trusting to vows or ties that may (or may not) bind, and that relies on communication and honesty, allowing for change.
Air: King of Swords – To me, this represents my work. Everything I do is airy – writing, modeling, editing, teaching, communicating, mediating. Yet right now, I don’t feel it is particularly organized or functional. I always get done what has to be done, kind of like triage – but there are always things nagging at me that I believe at least that I want to be doing, such as writing the books that are currently not getting written on this site. Work and personal and health issues have prevented that – or so I tell myself. Is there more I need to know about my own motivation, organization, will-power when it comes to things that I have a choice to do? Somehow I feel the King of Swords can help my cut through all this *** and get to the root of the problem. He won’t pull any punches, he can bring structure and order to my thought processes and perhaps help me find some internal dedication. He won’t hesitate to provide needed criticism and guidance, and maybe I can learn something from how he got to where he is.
Fire: Knight of Wands – I struggled with what part of my life this element represents for a while. It’s not my career. That is going along just fine and I could truly care less about any further advancement there. Passion goes in the Lovers category above. Finally, I realized that it is my social life – what there is of it. My only real goal when this year started was to get out and be more social – find things in the community I like to do and go do them. There’s no lack of things like this in Olympia, that’s a large part of why I moved here. It just takes a little effort, especially when I don’t necessarily have anyone to go with – all the more reason, as this is the only way I’m ever going to meet anyone (outside of work) who shares my interests. So, I thought of the Knight of Wands. He’s very social, energetic, charismatic, and not afraid to have new adventures. In fact, he seeks them out, which is what I’d like to do. In recent years, I’ve learned to take more risks in life because of the fantastic experiences you can gain. He seems to embody that philosophy – sure there are risks, but better to truly live life than to let it pass you by – the biggest risk of all.
Spirit: The Star – This card seems to embody all the ways in which I am most at peace. Being out in nature is essential; being connected to the earth and to the universe, and to each moment of passing time. To live in the now and appreciate the sunlight and drops of rain on the flowering trees, the feeling of a cat purring in your lap, a quiet moment with your lover. Honesty and openness are my guide, and belief that whatever comes is meant for some reason. The more I am present and capable of accepting and responding to the gifts of life, the more I will be at peace.
So these are my guiding cards, my advisors and significators. It hasn’t escaped my notice that two are majors and three are court cards. I didn’t plan it this way, but worked on each card and element individually. The majors don’t surprise me – these are big changes and issues. The courts are fascinating. Not only that there are so many, but that none of them are ones that I have ever associated with myself. There is a lot of male energy here, and a youthful energy in the Knights. Physical energy overall is something I need more of, and so perhaps this reflects that desire. Maybe I just need to hear some new voices :) It will be interesting to hear what they have to say.